About a week ago Memo Juez informed me that Casey Anthony is a person who exists. I really haven’t being paying attention to the news lately. After a little research, I learned that she is some sort of a minor celebrity for having possibly killed her kid.

Don’t worry, Internet. I’ll get to the bottom of this.

The case for the defense is basically that Casey found her kid dead in a pool, and reacted by stashing the body in the woods and making like nothing had ever happened.

Again, this is the case being made by the defense.

Her plan didn’t work, evidently. It seems that she had made the age-old mistake of telling her family that she had a baby, and they wanted to see the thing. Fuck! So Casey called the cops and said that her daughter had been kidnapped, oh, you know, about a month previously. I don’t know how much more strongly I can stress that this is the version of the story designed to make Casey Anthony look good.

Let’s see… Smallville was on, so it had to have been a Thursday… so she was kidnapped… yeah, 33 days ago. Why, have you seen her? Teehee!

Why are people even interested in this case? There doesn’t seem to be a lot of doubt that Casey Anthony is a shit human being. Best case scenario, if she wasn’t actively involved in killing her baby, she was at least okay with whatever happened. But people are arguing about it, and even defending her.

Why?

Oh.

Casey Anthony is young, fit, and has sort of pretty eyes. That’s really the whole story. If she was a bit chubby, you could rest assured that she would have fried by now, but people find it distasteful to punish attractive women so hey, guys, can’t we let her off with a warning?

Come on! It’s the first time she’s done it, I’m pretty sure.